He’s a Gadfly on the Wall. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of February 8, 2019
Spiders need rebranding. First up…
The Girl in the Spider’s Web
If hackers are going to rig elections why
not just elect them to office?
However, the cyber-terrorist in this
thriller has her fingers in something more illicit.
While she currently crusades against
criminals as a masked vigilante, Lisbeth Salander (Claire Foy) occasionally
does hack-and-grab gigs like the one an ex-NSA agent (Stephen Merchant) just
hired her to undertake. Unfortunately, the nuclear launch codes she stole for
him have now made her the target of an active agent (Lakeith Stanfield) and a
secret cabal called the Spiders.
Not only does this continuation of the
Millennium series reduce its intricate lead to an action movie cliché, but this
adaptation of the 4th novel also softens the edges of the risqué series
creating a sterile knock-off that pales in comparison to both of its American
and Swedish predecessors.
Incidentally, the only people on earth who
can safely date a hacker are the Amish.
Red Light
The Front Runner
When having an affair with a presidential
hopeful be sure their not the candidate you want to win.
Case in point, the philandering front
runner found cheating in this political drama.
With his good looks and supportive wife
(Vera Farmiga), Colorado senator Gary Hart (Hugh Jackman) expects to secure the
Democratic presidential nomination that eluded him in 1984. While the media and
public at large feel the same way, Hart’s hopes are soon dash after he
encourages the press to scrutinize his private life. What they discover however
is that the saintly senator is cheating.
While Jackman turns in a decent performance
in this timely depiction of actual events, the rest of the talented cast is
wasted on a floundering script that is more focused on analyzing Hart’s actions
than constructing an effective political allegory.
Besides, smart candidates get their spouses
to cheat on them so they can get pity votes.
Yellow Light
The Grinch
The easiest way to ruin Christmas is to
redirect all Amazon shipments to the Third World.
Thankfully, the party-pooper in this
animated movie lives a cave with no WiFi.
A green hermit named The Grinch (Benedict
Cumberbatch) watches over Whoville from his mountaintop with much disdain,
particularly for its obsession with the yuletide. To quell the joyous season
this year, The Grinch hatches a plan to impersonate Santa so he can pilfer all
presents and decorations from the neighbouring township. Meanwhile, a Whoville
child hopes to capture Claus so she can make a wish for her overworked mother
(Rashida Jones).
Outside of the sappy single mom storyline,
Cumberbatch’s nasally performance and some slick animation, this adaptation of
Dr. Seuss’ children’s book pretty much follows the same narrative of the far
superior 2-D animated TV special.
Moreover, if The Grinch hates Christmas so
much he should just convert to Islam. Red Light
***Bad Press Release***
Susan Slept Here
Christmas is the best time to cheat because
you already have gifts to make up for it.
That’s why it makes sense for the
screenwriter in this romantic comedy to have a holiday affair.
On Christmas Eve Oscar winner Mark (Dick
Powell) is visited by the Vice Squad, who have brought him a 17-year-old
runaway, Susan (Debbie Reynolds), as inspiration for his new script about
delinquency. But when Mark learns that Susan will be jailed until 18, he
marries her. Their abrupt nuptials however don’t sit well with Mark’s fiancée
(Anne Francis), his US Senator father-in-law or the press.
If the comedy were as risqué as the romance
than this 1954 adaptation of the stage-play wouldn’t be as creepy as it is. But
with little else to offer besides the illicit affair, this Techicolour romp is
pure trash.
Besides, when you marry a 17-year-old you
have to pay for their University.
He’s Underageless. He’s the…
Vidiot
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