He’s a Self-Driving Instructor. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of November 10, 2017
Automated cars get to pick the radio
station. First up…
Cars 3
The upside to living in a world ruled by
sentient vehicles is ample parking.
Mind you, the articulate autos in this 3-D
animated movie refer to parking spaces as condos.
Weathered racer veteran Lightning McQueen
(Owen Wilson) is sent to the scrap heap when tech-savvy newcomer Jackson Storm
(Armie Hammer) joins the Piston Cup race circuit and bests all of his lap
records.
While he is on the mend Lightning takes his
new trainer Cruz Ramirez (Cristela Alonzo) under his wing and, instead, helps
her achieve her own racing aspirations; with a little help from a mysterious
mechanic (Chris Cooper).
Although the animation in this second
sequel is superlative, its sad storyline spins its tires on long bouts of
boring dialogue with high speed racing only bookending its PC narrative.
Moreover, the voice work feels uninspired by the laugh-free script.
Besides, even self-driving cars find NASCAR
to be completely boring. Red Light
The Glass Castle
Dysfunctional families work best when
everyone in the family is dysfunctional.
Unfortunately, it’s only the father in this
drama that cannot stay sober.
Born and raised in an unstable home
environment by her alcoholic father Rex (Woody Harrelson) and her free-spirited
mother Rose Mary (Naomi Watts), Jeannette Walls (Brie Larson) and her two
siblings struggle to stay sane.
Constantly on the move due to their dad’s
gambling debts and social services, the children are perpetually placated by
Rex’s flowery promises of a better life just around the corner.
Dealing with sensitive subject matter like
rape, incest and substance abuse head on, this melodramatic adaptation of
Walls’ own biography tries too hard to find a silver lining in the oppressive
sadness. While the performances are impactful, the Hollywood ending feels as
fanciful as one of the father’s yarns.
Incidentally, alcoholics sacrifice sobriety
so their children can someday write a bestselling tell-all. Yellow Light
Ingrid Goes West
The upside to Internet stalking is that you
don’t have to hide in thorny bushes anymore.
In fact, as this dark comedy points out,
you don’t even need to disguise your voice nowadays.
Subsequent to her release from a mental
institution, social media stalker Ingrid (Aubrey Plaza) finds her latest online
crush in Instagram star Taylor (Elizabeth Olsen). With a large inheritance in
tow, Ingrid relocates to LA and worms her way into Taylor’s trendsetting world.
But when questions concerning Ingrid’s life
arise, she must convince her stoner landlord (O'Shea Jackson Jr.) to pose as
her boyfriend in order to keep her ruse going.
A brutal critique of humanities vanity in
creating false realities online and the sad sack followers that swoon over
every corporate sponsored post, this sardonic production also has a number of
outstanding comedic performances to help get its point across.
Moreover, online fame is as lucrative as
real fame except you get paid in bitcoin.
Green Light
***Pointed Tailpipe***
The Car
If cars drive themselves who is going to
tip the squeegee kid at the light?
Actually, the self-driving vehicle in this
thriller would most likely run them down.
A mysterious black Lincoln Continental
appears in town one day and proceeds to rundown cyclists, hitchhikers and the
high school marching band. After the driverless death machine massacres the
sheriff, deputy Wade (James Brolin) is left to protect the townsfolk.
With a plan to draw the killer car into a
canyon to crush it, the impenetrable auto preempts Wade’s plan at every turn.
Begging the question: is it possessed?
Although it predates other haunted hotrod
horror movies by a few years, this low-budget road movie lacks the style and
story of those later releases. However, The Car has maintained a cult status
amongst genre fans for its demonic origin.
Sadly, it’s not the devil perpetrating
killer car attacks anymore, but ISIS members.
He’s an Air Bagman. He’s the…
Vidiot
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