He’s Hard Correspondence. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of April 4, 2014
This just in: No One Watches the News. First up…
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues
In the world of online news, it’s not the facts that matter,
it’s the misleading headline used to generate ad revenue.
Thankfully, this comedy takes place before Yahoo! News.
During the 1980s, newsman Ron Burgundy (Will Ferrell) and
his wife (Christina Applegate) leave San Diego to co-host the nightly news in
New York.
But when she gets promoted, he can’t cope.
Recruited by a fledging 24-hour news network just before
hitting rock bottom, Ron resuscitates his former news team (Paul Rudd, Steve
Carell, David Koechner) and takes to the air again.
Despite a handful of memorable lines, this much-ballyhooed
sequel to the 2004 cult hit doesn’t live up to its own hype.
In fact, it struggles to make its goofball one-liners and
illogical situations standout from today's current crop of Ron
Burgundy-esque pitchmen that permeate the advertising landscape.
Incidentally, news anchoring is the only occupation
that would benefit from Tupac's hologram. Red Light
47 Ronin
The upside to being a masterless samurai is you longer have
to wear your hair in that weird looking bun.
Surprisingly, the forty-seven ronin in this action movie
still do the upsweep.
Kai (Keanu Reeves), a half-breed living in the wilds of
feudal Japan, is taken in by Lord Asano (Min Tanaka) and taught the way of the
samurai - unofficially.
One day a rival lord (Tadanobu Asano) kills Asano and claims
his daughter (Kou Shibasaki) as his wife.
Forbade by the Shogun to seek revenge, the head ronin
(Hiroyuki Sanada) ignores their order, recruits his former warriors, including
Kai, and infiltrates the wedding.
Inspired by the ancient Japanese legend, this whitewashed
retelling relies more on mysticism then actual facts to tell its tale.
While the special effects are noteworthy, the acting and the
adventure are uninspired.
Incidentally, if you’re half Japanese, you should only have
to perform seppuku halfway. Red Light
***Fat Assassin***
Beverly Hills Ninja
The best part of being a ninja is that the all-black outfit
has a slimming effect.
Mind you, it doesn’t seem to be working on the assassin in
this comedy.
An American (Nicollette Sheridan) hires Haru (Chris Farley)
- a klutzy Caucasian adopted by a ninja clan when he was a baby - to
investigate her boyfriend’s suspicious behaviour.
When Haru discovers a counterfeiting operation, he travels
to Beverly Hills to advise his client, only to learn she isn’t who she said she
is and that the case now involves a murder.
Watching over Haru on his Sensei’s (Soon-Tek Oh) behest is
his Haru’s adopted brother (Robin Shou), who protects him from afar.
Although this is not the stout SNL alum’s best comic outing,
Beverly Hills Ninja does play to Chris Farley’s strengths: incessant pratfalls
and dumb-guy naivety.
Ironically, when you send a fat ninja to California, they
come back home anorexic.
He Overeats his Words. He’s the...
Vidiot
No comments:
Post a Comment