Thursday, December 21, 2017

Be Kind, Please Rewind

He’s a Blitz(en)krieg. He’s the…

Vidiot

Week of December 22, 2017

Santa fought against the allies in WWII. First up…


Dunkirk

The most heroic role a soldier can assume during wartime is that of USO entertainer.

Mind you, being in the thick of it, like the men in this drama, is a close second.

On the beaches of Dunkirk, 1940, a pair of privates (Fionn Whitehead, Aneurin Barnard), along with thousands of other British troops, attempt to evacuate soon-to-be Nazis occupied Frances.

Overhead, a RAF spitfire pilot (Tom Hardy) keeps encroaching German dive-bombers at bay while the Royal Navy (Kenneth Branagh) scrambles civilians (Mark Rylance) to assist in the mass exodus on their behalf.

With little dialogue to work with, writer/director Christopher Nolan’s depiction of the infamous English event is mostly told through sight and sound. And while both elements do provide many impactful moments in the film’s breezy runtime, the flimsy, inaccurate narrative and weak characters suffer unduly.

Moreover, the fastest way to flee during wartime is on repurposed catapults.  Yellow Light



Mother!

Houseguests are the reason why God created hotels, motels and hostiles.

Unfortunately, you would have to combine all 3 to accommodate the unwanted lodgers in this psychological horror.

Mother (Jennifer Lawrence) awakens in a strange house where she searches for her husband, Him (Javier Bardem), a prominent poet paralyzed by writer’s block. She eventually finds Him entertaining a man (Ed Harrris) and his family (Michelle Pfeiffer, Domhnall Gleeson), who have asked for accommodations.

When Mother becomes pregnant, Him’s creative juices begin to flow but his new work attracts throngs of fervent fans who invade and ransack the couple’s home.

A curious allegory on Eden, writer/director Darren Aronofsky delivers a divisive take on Mother Earth and her creator that will test viewer’s patience. Nevertheless, a case can be made for his artistic effort even though it my take time to appreciate.

Incidentally, to rid yourself of houseguests just disconnect the Wi-Fi.  Yellow Light  

***North Polemic***

  
Mrs. Santa Claus

Mrs. Claus is childless because she was made from spare doll parts by Santa’s elves.

Nonetheless, this fantasy maintains she is much more than Santa’s sex-doll.

After a fight with her husband (Charles Durning) over new flight paths for Christmas 1910, Anna Claus (Angela Lansbury) steals his magic sleigh and heads to NYC. But when Cupid gets hurt, she is laid over in the Big Apple and must lodge with a poor family. 

While slumming it, she involves herself in important social issues of the time, including child labour laws and a woman’s right to vote.

Although this is a Hallmark television movie from 1996, it does, in some wacky way, deal with real world woes head-on. As well, it manages to finally give Santa’s silently doting housewife a voice, and it’s a dissenting one at that.     

Furthermore, if Santa were a woman she would knock before entering your house.

He’s a Jingle Bellhop. He’s the…

Vidiot




  





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