Be Kind, Please Rewind

He’s Returning to Deform. He’s the…

Vidiot

Week of August 10, 2012

Defecting is the most popular Olympic event. First up…

The Lorax

Thankfully, my lorax was removed when I was a child so there’s no chance of my neck exploding.

Oops! This isn’t a movie about that volatile organ in the human throat but an animated feature regarding a numinous creature.

Set in a self-contained community littered with artificial foliage, a young denizen (Zac Efron) sets out to find a real tree to impress a girl (Taylor Swift) he has a crush on.

On the counsel of his grandmother (Betty White) he seeks out a hermit (Ed Helms) beyond Thneed-Ville’s fortified walls.

According to legend, this solitudinarian knows the truth about the trees, and their magical protector: The Lorax (Danny DeVito).

Based on the book by Dr. Seuss, The Lorax lacks its author’s eccentric exuberance. Instead, it festers with corporate-hating eco-doctrine set to a puerile soundtrack.

Incidentally, as far as the absent tree situation goes, the town’s beaver infestation could be responsible.  0

LOL

The best part of texting while walking is the protective bubble it creates around you, staving off danger.

LOL! This dramedy isn’t about distracted pedestrians surviving collisions with LRT, but the tribulations of the e-generation.

Lola (Miley Cyrus) is a contemporary teenager. She communicates via characters and has a super cute BF (George Finn).

But when he cheats on her, she hooks up with his friend (Douglas Booth), who is lusted after by Lola’s nemesis (Ashley Greene).

Meanwhile, Lola’s single-mother (Demi Moore) finds her diary and decides to cancel her class trip to Paris. All the while juggling her ex (Thomas Jane) and her younger crush (Jay Hernandez).

Though it attempts to be a comedic commentary on today’s parent/child relationships, this American version of a French film is merely a vapid snapshot of this electronic epoch.

On the bright side, Miley Cyrus texting is less annoying than Miley Cyrus talking. 0

***Texting ‘bout My Generation***

Clueless 

The worst part of being a teenager in the 1990s was that absentee parenting was 15 years away.

Fortunately, the spoilt socialite in this comedy is on good terms with her single-father.

When a severely un-hip chick, Tai (Brittany Murphy), transfers to their high school, Cher (Alicia Silverstone) and Dionne (Stacey Dash) attempt to turn the kindhearted new girl into a shallow shopaholic like them.

On the home front, Cher’s father (Dan Hedaya) has taken her ex-stepbrother (Paul Rudd) in, leading to constant bickering between the two.

However, her home life doesn’t stop Cher from using her matchmaking skills to pair Tai with Elton (Jeremy Sisto), who, unfortunately, has a big time crush on Cher.

The quintessential deconstruction of affluent teenagers, this Jane Austin’s Emma inspired coming-of-age tale is a witty and relevant representation of a naive generation.

Incidentally, thanks to Wikipedia, at least today’s young people can feign intelligence.

He's the Inner Voice of a Generation. He's the...

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