Be Kind, Please Rewind

He’s a Right Wingman. He’s the…

Vidiot

Week of August 24, 2012

The poor can’t afford to be rich. First up…

The Dictator

Remove their medals, fatigues and facial hair, and dictators are nothing but unbalanced people with access to nuclear arms.

Unfortunately, the tetchy tyrant in this comedy has lost all of the above.

Before he can address the UN, Admiral General Aladeen (Sacha Baron Cohen), a merciless, misogynistic martinet from Wadiya, North African, is kidnapped.

Beardless and powerless, he must now earn an honest living in NYC. 

Meanwhile, a look-a-like hired by Aladeen’s uncle (Ben Kingsley) presents the Security Council with plans to covert Wadiya into a democracy.

Incensed, the insolvent Aladeen must seek the aid of an impudent female (Anna Faris) if he hopes to regain his regime.

While it takes awhile to hit its stride, once it does, there are heaps of offensive religious, political and sexual jokes for infidels to worship.

Incidentally, the best way to usurp any authoritarian administration is to include third-party candidates on the ballot.  0

A Separation

The worst part of separating from your spouse is deciding who’ll get to ignore the kids during the week and who gets to on the weekend.

Fortunately, the offspring caught in-between her parents’ separation in this drama is desired by both sides.

A marriage is torn apart when Simin (Leila Hatami) decides she wants to flee Iran so her daughter (Sarina Farhadi) can have a better life.

But her husband Nader (Peyman Moaadi) is resolved to care for his father who has dementia.

With Simin gone, Nader hires a caretaker (Sareh Bayat), who later accuses him of causing her miscarriage when he expels her for stealing.

With Nader facing murder charges, Simin must return and defend him.

Using marital separation to analyze Iran’s religious, sexual and class divisions, A Separation is an intense and indelible experience.

Besides, estranged wives always return home once they start to miss their husband’s farts. 0

Bernie

The best part of dating a senior citizen is that you have from 5 p.m. to 5 a.m. the next morning to cheat on them.

However, loyalty is only one of the many attributes the undertaker in this docu-dramedy posses.

Arriving in a small Texan town, the gregarious Bernie (Jack Black) quickly lands a position at the local mortuary, where his stirring sermons and angelic voice woe mourners. 

Although single, Bernie spends inordinate amounts of time with Marge (Shirley MacLaine), a recent widow and the town’s richest resident.

But when Marge goes missing, and her estranged family comes looking for her, Bernie must concoct a pretext to prevent the D.A. (Matthew McConaughey) from uncovering the truth about her whereabouts.

Part quirky mockumentary, part horrify crime drama, this fact-based yarn highlights a brilliant performance by Black.

Incidentally, when you date a senior you get invited to all the swankiest D-Day ceremonies.  0

Chimpanzee

The wild can be a dangerous place for a chimpanzee. Mostly because tire swings in their natural form are attached to speeding vehicles.

Fortunately, there are no SUVs for the primates in this documentary to be pinned under.

When his mother is killed in a territorial skirmish with a rival tribe lead by the cruel Scar, a young chimp named Oscar must learn to survive on his own.

Lonely and emaciated, Oscar struggles to retain the survival lessons that his mother instilled in him, but to no avail.

Luckily, an unpredictable bachelor in the tribe does something completely unexpected and adopts the orphaned ape as his own.

Narrated by Tim Allen, this Disney nature documentary features fantastic up-close footage of life amongst our relatives, paying particularly close attention to how their empathy apes our own.

However, in cases like this, I always thought that guardianship went to the monkey’s uncle.  0

***Weekend of the Line***

Weekend at Bernie's

Realistically, if you are going to be walking around with a corpse, it’s best to do so in a cold climate.

However, the friends gallivanting around with a carcass in this comedy aren’t interested in retarding its putrefaction.

After co-workers and friends, Larry (Andrew McCarthy) and Richard (Jonathan Silverman) uncover insurance fraud at their investment firm, they take their findings to their boss, Bernie (Terry Kiser), who invites them up to his Hamptons home to discuss the matter.

But when Bernie’s assassinated, the dimwits decide to act as if nothing has happened, pretending that their host is still alive.

Through elaborate means, the duo manage to deter the would-be killer, if only for a short time.

While its ludicrous plot deteriorates faster than Bernie’s flesh, this outlandish comedy, however, does find ingenious ways of keeping the titular character animated.

Furthermore, a stiff at the beach makes an ideal paddleboard.

He's a Bad Buoy. He's the...

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