He’s a Tyrannosaurus Rx. He’s the…
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Week of September 21, 2018
Prescription drugs killed the dinosaurs.
First up….
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
The big difference between a Disney and a
Jurassic theme park is that the workers inside of the dinosaur mascots were
eaten.
An active volcano, like the one in this
sci-fi movie, would be another disparity between the parks.
Three years after Jurassic World was
abandoned to its reptilian inhabitants a volcanic eruption threatens to wipeout
the cloned species unless Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard), the previous operations
manager, and Owen (Chris Pratt), a Raptor wrangler, can save them from
extinction. However, the solution to move the creatures to a private sanctuary
may not be in the beasts’ best interest either.
While the visuals continue to dominate in
this obligatory sequel to the blockbuster reboot of the franchise, Fallen
Kingdom falters when it comes to telling a compelling or innovative story to
accompany those eye-popping effects.
Moreover, the only way to ever gain control
over dinosaurs is to clone Fred Flintstone.
Yellow Light
Uncle Drew
Geriatric athletes are popular these days
because they physically cannot take a knee during the anthem.
Mind you, the old-timers in this comedy can
not only take a knee but also slam-dunk.
Determined to prove his coaching prowess to
his rival (Nick Kroll) by winning a street-ball tournament, Dax (Lil Rel
Howery) recruits local legend Uncle Drew (Kyrie Irving) to play for his team.
But the elderly baller won’t hit the court
unless it’s with his equally aged teammates (Shaquille O'Neal, Chris Webber,
Reggie Miller, Nate Robinson), whom Dax must now get game ready to face the
younger teams.
Based on a Pepsi advertisement, this
feature-length comedy is devoid of laughs. While it is exciting to see these
NBA players in action, watching them do so in a grey wigs and face prosthetics
is just creepy.
Furthermore, who wants to go watch their
sports team play at the Depends arena?
Red Light
Heats Beat Loud
The upside to having your father in your
band is that he is fully aware of your heroin addiction.
Thankfully, the only thing holding back the
duo in this dramedy is higher education.
Widower Frank (Nick Offerman) deals with
the idea of his daughter Sam (Kiersey Clemons) going away to college by
starting a garage band with her over the summer. While she is hesitant to get
distracted from her studies, her girlfriend (Sasha Lane) convinces Sam to
record a song with her dad, which, in turn, becomes a minor hit. Now, Sam’s
college dreams are overshadowed by this new opportunity.
While the song recording process captured
does serve as an excellent how-to for up-and-coming musicians, the actual songs
featured are hardly hit material. However, the characters are real and their
relationships relatable.
Plus, when your dad is in your band he can
help repair the hotel rooms you trash. Yellow Light
***Mick Drop***
The Commitments
Blues music is not popular in Ireland
because the Irish have nothing to be miserable about.
That simple reason is why the band in this
comedy chose to cover soul music instead.
Determined to prove his prowess as a band
manager, young Dubliner Jimmy (Robert Arkins) puts an ad in the newspaper
looking for local talent to start a soul band. Among the freaks that audition,
he finds some serviceable horn players and back-up singers.
After weeks of rehearsal, the band garners
some local success. But infighting and affairs threaten to derail Jimmy’s
dream.
While the songs sung are soul music
standards, the new vocal talent behind the melodies brings these classics to
life in a new way. Based on the novel by Roddy Doyle, this hilarious
toe-tapping adaptation from 1991 still holds up today.
What’s more, it’s nice to see Irishmen
playing instruments that aren’t just empty whiskey jugs.
He’s a Diss Track Star. He’s the…
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