He’s Amorally Superior. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of March 16, 2018
With great powers come great Youtube
videos. First up…
Justice League
The best thing about having Superman on
your team is that you don’t have to work so hard.
Unfortunately, the super-friends in this
fantasy are down one Kryptonian.
In the wake of Superman’s (Henry Cavill)
death the evil Steppenwolf (Ciarán Hinds) returns to reclaim three hidden
artifacts that will allow him to transform Earth’s environment into a living
Hell.
To prevent this from happening, Batman (Ben
Affleck) and Wonder Woman (Gal Gadot) recruit The Flash (Ezra Miller), Aquaman
(Jason Momoa), and Cyborg (Ray Fisher) to help intercept the relics before
Steppenwolf’s minions unite them.
The quasi-sequel to Batman v Superman, DC’s
ensemble film featuring its flagship comic-book characters is as half-baked as
its roster of metahumans. With no character development, a generic villain and
embarrassing dialogue, this CGI laden actioner never stops to flesh out its
one-dimensional story.
Incidentally, recipients of Superman’s
transplanted organs should stay out of direct sunlight. Red Light
The Shape of Water
The upside to a having a fish-man on your
superhero squad is they can unclog any toilet.
Surprisingly, the hybrid in this fantasy
isn’t affiliated with any sequential art.
When a military colonel (Michael Shannon)
arrives at a top-secret aquarium with a mysterious sea-creature in tow, mute
cleaning lady Elisa (Sally Hawkins) is inexplicably drawn to the cryptic
convict.
While she and her co-worker (Octavia
Spencer) are warned not to interact with the army’s asset (Doug Jones), Elisa
lunches with it anyways. When she learns of its imminent dissection, she
enlists her neighbor (Richard Jenkins) and a scientist (Michael Stuhlbarg) to
help free her new friend.
Steeped in classic monster movie ethos,
writer/director Guillermo del Toro crafts beautifully shot fan fiction of the
Creature from the Black Lagoon and, in the process, manages to make his
crossover masterpiece.
The downside to dating a fish-man, however,
is permanent shrinkage. Green Light
The Disaster Artist
If making movies were easy the Hollywood
elite would have no one to sexually assault.
Fortunately, the filmmaker in this dramedy
is able to finance his feature sans studio.
Greg Sestero (Dave Franco) has a hard time
coming out of his shell in acting class until he partners with nonconformist
classmate, Tommy Wiseau (James Franco).
The independently wealthy Wiseau invites
Greg to LA to peruse their acting dreams. When neither is successful, Wiseau
writes a script for Greg, that he produces and directs. What Wiseau creates is
considered to be one of the worst movies ever made.
Based on Greg’s book about the making of
The Room, director James Franco takes a stellar treatment and turns it into a
touching and comical recreation of the unbelievable events. Franco also does an
uncanny job of portraying Wiseau.
Fortunately, nowadays when a movie is bad
they just release it in 3-D. Green Light
***Man of Steal***
The Invisible Man
Invisibility is the best superhero power
because you don’t have to wear a spandex costume.
Regrettably, the unseen man in this
horror-fantasy leans more to supervillain-y.
Swathed in bandages, a cloaked traveler,
Griffin (Claude Rains), checks into a remote English inn to conduct chemistry
experiments undisturbed. When the belligerent border’s antics begin to disrupt
the pub below, the innkeeper calls the coppers to evict their volatile visitor.
But the Bobbies are unable to dislodge the lodger because they cannot see him.
Naked as a jaybird, and mad as a hatter,
Griffin embarks on a killing spree.
Based on H.G. Wells’ groundbreaking novel,
Frankenstein director James Whale undertakes the intangible challenge of
bringing this imperceptible madman to life and - despite the annoying
innkeeper’s wife – executes a masterful cinematic achievement in both visual
and sound effects.
Moreover, the invisible man is easy to locate
once the wolf man has his scent.
He’s a Freak of Nature Walk. He’s the…
Vidiot
No comments:
Post a Comment