He’s a Boxing Ring Bearer. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of March 4, 2016
Rusty nails on the gloves would really amp
boxing up. First up…
Creed
The reason why retired boxers don’t do
color commentary is because their concussed brains see 4 fighters instead of 2.
Surprisingly, the archaic pugilist in this
drama has contracted a non-boxing ailment.
Determined to make a name for himself in
the ring, Adonis (Michael B. Jordan), the son of Apollo Creed, seeks out his
father’s old rival and friend, Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone), to train him.
When the media gets wind of Adonis legacy,
he quickly lands a landmark bout.
But his shot at the light heavyweight
championship is endangered when his mentor is diagnosed with cancer.
A refreshing addition to the Rocky
anthology, Creed is as much homage to the original as it is an update of the
mythos.
With knockout performances, kinetic
direction, and rapid-fire editing all aiding in its inspirational yet
unconventional sports movie trajectory.
Conversely, retired ringside cutman can
always get seasonal stitch-work with the NHL.
Green Light
The Danish Girl
Most men only want to be female so that
they can cry their way out of speeding tickets.
However, the dude in this drama actually
identifies with the feminine gender.
When asked by his wife Gerda (Alicia
Vikander) to model nylons for a portrait, Einar Wegener’s (Eddie Redmayne)
secret desire to cross-dress is finally sated.
Encouraged by Gerda to go a gala as his
alter ego Lilli, Einer attends the event in drag and attracts the eye of a
bachelor Henrik (Ben Whishaw).
Later, Gerda’s paintings of Lilli begin to
sell, while Lilli herself undergoes a procedure to become a permanent woman so
she can marry Henrik.
Although its transgendered subject matter
is certainly timely and Redmayne’s performance is utterly transcending, most of
the facts of this fact-based biography are bent to better its provocative love
story.
Incidentally, a telltale sign if a woman
was once a man is their level of flatulence.
Yellow Light
Room
To catch child abductors, the police should
be staking out Home Depot’s sex-dungeon department.
Unfortunately, the captor’s enclosure in
this drama was preexisting.
Raised by his mother, Joy (Brie Larson), in
a backyard shed belonging to the man who abducted her when she was a teenager,
five-year-old Jack (Jacob Tremblay) is completely unaware of life beyond the
room where she and he are imprisoned.
After a successful escape, the two try to
acclimate to outside life. This includes reconciling with Joy’s now-divorced
parents (Joan Allen, William H. Macy) and dealing with the media’s victim
shaming.
The most frightening yet life-affirming
films in years, this character-driven adaption of the novel will resonate with
views, not only for its brave performances, but also for Jack’s alien-like
viewpoint of the world we take for granted.
Ironically, the shut-ins discovered that
everyone in the outside world was being held captive in a virtual prison. Green
Light
***Foxy Boxing Day***
Girlfight
The main thing that separates male and
female boxers is the hair and make-up team the woman’s corner.
Mind up, the feminine prizefighter in this
drama doesn’t like to cover up her black eyes.
Troubled teenager Diana (Michelle
Rodriguez) finds an outlet for her angry when she attends her brother’s boxing
lesson. But she is unable to afford a trainer until he decides to drops out and
pursue art.
Eventually she forms a relationship with
her sparring partner (Jaime Tirelli). But it is later jeopardized when they are
set to fight one another, and he refuses to step into the ring.
The gritty Indy love story that put
Michelle Rodriguez on the map, Girlfight is a balanced battle-of-the-sexes
sports drama that confronts heavyweight issues, like poverty, abuse and
suicide, with tact and artistry.
However, female boxing would be more
popular if opponents didn’t apologize to each other after every punch.
He’s Throwing in the Sanitary Towel. He’s
the…
Vidiot
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