He’s Got Something to Disprove. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of May 29, 2015
Being in someone’s shadow is only cool
during the summer. First up…
Seventh Son
The best thing about going to a witch
burning is the crone- flavoured s’mores everyone gets to enjoy afterwards.
Unfortunately, the townsfolk in this
fantasy will have to put their bonfire on hold.
Empowered by the approaching Blood Moon,
sorceress supreme Mother Malkin (Julianne Moore) is freed from the confines of
a grizzled knight, Master Gregory (Jeff Bridges), killing his apprentice during
her escape.
Tasked with recapturing Malkin before her
newfound powers enslave humanity, Gregory must first recruit a replacement
apprentice to aid him on this quest.
While legend dictates it to be the seventh
son (Ben Barnes) of a seventh son, Gregory truly doubts his new pupil’s
witch-hunter abilities.
With a derivative mentor/mentee adventure
script, a baffling accent from Bridges, and too many awkward-looking creature
designs to mention, this adaption of the YA book series is embarrassingly
outdated and insipid.
Besides, the only apprentice an armoured
knight needs is WD-40. Red Light
What We Do in the Shadows
The hardest part of rooming with another
vampire is deciding who gets to sleep in the larger coffin.
Luckily, the sleeping arrangements in this
comedy have already been decided.
On the promise they won’t be drained of
plasma, a documentary film-crew is permitted to capture the night-to-night
activities of a group of vampires (Jemaine Clement, Taika Waititi, Jonathan
Brugh, Ben Fransham) sharing a flat in New Zealand.
In the shadow of this year’s masquerade
ball, the roommates must not only contend with the death of their oldest roomy,
but also the arrival of a novice vampire and his human friend.
A hysterical take on the found-footage
genre, this Kiwi contribution perfectly captures the idiosyncratic drawbacks
and benefits to being undead - and having roommates.
With a clever script connecting the gags
seamlessly, this morbid mockumentary has cult classic potential.
Ironically, blood-sucking roommates aren’t
as inclined to vacuum as one would assume.
Green Light
***Side-Kick-Starter Campaign***
American Movie
Thanks to crowd-sourcing your movies online
your film’s financial investors are now faceless strangers without legal
representation.
But as this mockumentary confirms, in the
late-90s’, aspiring auteurs were indebted to their families.
When Mark’s (Mark Borchardt) feature film
project is put on hold due to a lack of funding, he redirects his focus to an
unfinished horror movie of his called Coven.
With his senile uncle Ben backing the
short-film and his best friend (Mike Schank) serving as sound-engineer, Mark
and many of the townsfolk begin to make one of the worst movies ever made.
Marred by his alcoholism, lack of
organization and ongoing custody battle with his ex, Mark’s cinematic debut is
threatened at every angle.
One of the first and funniest found-footage
documentaries to follow around down-and-out losers, American Movie is
inventive, inspiring and awkwardly uproarious.
Nowadays, however, the hardest part of
moviemaking is choosing which bestseller to adapt.
He’s a Registered Cinephile. He’s the…
Vidiot
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