He Blinded Justice. He’s the…
Vidiot
Week of July 15, 2011
My law suit is at the cleaners. First up…
The Lincoln Lawyer
It makes sense for lawyers to apply their trade from their vehicles: they’ll be the first ones at the fender-bender with a waiting neck brace and wheel chair.
Regrettably, the attorney in this mystery doesn’t practice personal injury law, but one much worse.
Proud to counsel crooks from the confines of his chauffeured Lincoln Town Car, criminal lawyer Haller (Matthew McConaughey) is further elated when he receives Louis (Ryan Phillippe), the son of a prominent Beverly Hills real estate agent (Frances Fisher), as a client.
However, Louis’ open-and-shut case hits a snag when Haller begins to suspect that the accused assailant that he is defending may be responsible for other attacks.
An amiable attempt at adapting the popular novel, this courtroom-thriller has a solid alibi of likable characters and proficient plot twists.
Moreover, if judges and jurors ever decide to likewise gain mobility, stretch Hummers will finally have a purpose. 0
Arthur
Spoiled rich kids make the best alcoholics because when they pass out, you can steal the keys to their Lamborghini.
However, when you party with the loaded lush in this comedy, at the end of the night, you get to steal the Batmobile.
To retain his pampered lifestyle, a permanently pixilated playboy, Arthur (Russell Brand), must marry his mother’s assistant (Jennifer Garner).
Afraid of financial autonomy, Arthur reluctantly agrees. He begins to reconsider, however, after he meets the like-minded Naomi (Greta Gerwig).
With help from his chauffeur (Luis Guzman) and nanny (Helen Mirren), Arthur betters himself. But with his wedding nuptials approaching, he is torn between family duty and his heart’s desire.
While it is a remake of the 1981 film, this Arthur stands on its own as an enjoyable and endearing comedy.
Fortunately, if he ever does become destitute, Arthur will already have the accompanying alcohol abuse down pat. 0
Rango
The best thing about a chameleon sheriff is that: no matter the skin colour of the criminal, they can never be accused of racial profiling.
Unfortunately, the colour-changing lawman in this animated-adventure must oversee a town filled with different species.
While traveling through the desert, pampered pet chameleon Rango (Johnny Depp) must learn to survive in the arid climate after falling from his owner’s vehicle.
Eventually, Rango makes his way to an Old West settlement, where he inadvertently disposes of a local bandit (Ray Winstone).
Impressed, the mayor (Ned Beatty) appoints the hapless hero to the position of sheriff. His first duty, however, is to solve the mystery behind the town’s missing water supply.
A phantasmagoria of slapstick comedy and Spaghetti Western inspiration, Rango is a visual treat that will engage and impress young and old.
Furthermore, with a tongue that long, he's also really popular amongst the local brothels. 0
Insidious
The reason homeowners prefer that the “bump in the night” be a desperate drug addict, opposed to a ghost, is because junkies have organs that can be sold to pay mortgages.
And while the family in this horror movie isn’t trading on the black market, they’d give anything for a tangible home-invader.
Plagued by spirits since moving into their new home, Renai (Rose Byrne) and Josh (Patrick Wilson) live in fear.
One day, their son (Ty Simpkins) falls into a coma. On the advice of Josh’s mother (Barbara Hershey) they call in an expert (Lin Shaye), who tells them their son’s astral body is being held captive by a demon wishing to possess his physical body.
Drenched in eldritch ambiance and imbued with nightmarish imagery, this macabre tale is a triumph of terror.
Fortunately, if things do go awry, there is a cure for demonically possessed children – it’s called Ritalin. 0
***The Burden of Hoof ***
The Devil’s Advocate
The cool thing about the Devil being your lawyer is that: depending on your body count, he may just work pro bono.
Fortunately, the defense lawyer in this horror movie is not Satan…his boss is.
While defending an accused pedophile, small-town attorney Kevin (Keanu Reeves) is approached by the prestigious law firm Milton, Chadwick and Waters.
Accepting their generous offer, Kevin and his wife (Charlize Theron) move to Manhattan, where he shines in the courtroom, but not on the home front.
With his marriage strained, his firm under investigation and lawyers turning up dead, Kevin approaches one of the partners, John Milton (Al Pacino), who reveals to him the demonic nature of the company and his part in it.
A courtroom drama and supernatural thriller hybrid, The Devil’s Advocate does an adequate job of representing both genres.
However, everyone knows that the real Devil in the courtroom is the stenographer.
He's a Satin Worshipper . He’s the…
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